Hello Project,
here, this is my story, tell it to you because I have no other things to tell about it. I
38 years and almost four months is over (maybe) my only love story, a good story, almost incredible guy who is now 21 years old and who was 19 when we met. Maybe I would have never entered into such a story if it were not for him, I ran away, but he was different, I loved him and I also to him. We were good, but sometimes, especially when we could not see us, had some days of deep melancholy. In those moments I thought that my presence at the bottom had not the strength to pull him out of his melancholy and it was a profound melancholy. The sex seemed above all a way to exorcise this melancholy but it inevitably returns. We all said, sometimes he got angry with me and told me that I did not understand, but despite everything we loved him deeply. Indeed from the beginning told me he loved me but that sex with me not really dragged. It did not surprise me because they are neither good nor too excited about certain things. He needed to fall in love even sexually, as had already happened before you know without being able to reach any conclusion because he was in love with a straight. I also said that he wanted to try with a girl and thought that it would be went well, but it really lacked a boy his age, or at least I thought it was so. Project, in 38 years I was beginning to think that being with him could be harm to him and who were living in another way his youth then I started to move away and leave the maximum space possible. When you do not chat with me, now he did not almost, chatted with a girl. I knew and he told me about it, then we felt less and less but we have never broken contacts, and we exchanged SMS messages on msn, very affectionate but I knew now that his path was different. In early October, I asked to see us and shows the girl, obviously a beautiful girl in love with him which is a nice guy. She knew nothing of not only us but even the fact that he was gay and that was me, this was obvious. I felt terribly uncomfortable. We went to get ice cream and then I went away with an excuse. He's been hurt in the evening and called me on msn. I asked him if he realized what he was doing with that girl and she told me that he loved and he was serious. I did not understand anything. He explained that they had made love and that he was fine. I did not know what to say, I tried to do everything not to disappoint him and encourage him to follow his own path or at least what he seemed on his way. Will not tell you how I was, mainly because I was told that the boy did not understand anything. I tried to keep him with a perfectly normal behavior, as before. After 15 days I called, came to my house, which was not a long time, and causes me just as it did before, but very sweet, as one who seeks a loving contact. I do not know what to do, I ask the girl and tells me that the girl is in love but not enough for him, he tried to do everything possible to forget about but did not succeed and that he needs me. At the moment it seems to me out of my head. He says he does not feel complete or to be alone with me or be alone with the girl. What puzzles me a bit ' first pulse and are tempted to dismiss it, but in practice it is impossible, I am a huge affection for me and you see that keeps us very much. When I hug him he's also a girl and I feel strange towards the girl. At the end, I know how things are and I accept it, and basically for me, I say honestly, it's not a shocking thing, but she knows nothing. We talk a lot right in this, I do not want to force any situation because I think that she would not accept it at all, would leave him and he would slip back into its bad and dark melancholy. I tell you honestly, Project, I love this guy, now I see him more relaxed than before, but I fear that his tentativo di conciliare cose difficilmente conciliabili lo porti a delusioni molto profonde. Lui della ragazza è innamorato veramente e si vede. Project, ho letto le cose che hai scritto sulla bisessualità e i conti tornano. Tu dici che per un gay mantenere un rapporto con un bisex è difficile ma io penso che ci riuscirei. Il problema adesso non sono io ma la possibile reazione della ragazza. Lui sa che con la ragazza deve parlarne ma non lo fa, prede tempo, e vive quel rapporto come se fosse un ragazzo etero. La ragazza non sa che ci vediamo e che lui dorme da me una sera a settimana e questo mi imbarazza terribilmente. Con lui sto bene, o meglio ci starei veramente bene solo se la ragazza accettasse veramente una cosa del genere, ma credo che non succederà ever. On the other hand to push him to talk to the girl I feel like pushing it to ruin. To him everything seems easy, probably just do not realize and it's about having a child with the girl, we really believe. Sometimes I feel so out of it but then when he comes to me, if I try to maintain a rigid position, there is bad and then hug him and I do not pretend to have all these thoughts in my head. When he sees me worried thinking about anything but the real reason for my concern. I thought I even talk to the girl, because she eventually I consider a despicable individual and would not have a point. What should I do Project? I'd like to talk a bit ' con te. Mi sa che quando parlavi di difficoltà di rapporto tra gay e bisex ti riferivi soprattutto a questo genere di problemi. Io non so nemmeno se sono innamorato di lui, so solo che gli voglio bene e che vorrei vederlo felice perché penso che abbia sofferto e che possa soffrire ancora molto più di me e non vorrei che accadesse per nessuna ragione.
Un abbraccio.
here, this is my story, tell it to you because I have no other things to tell about it. I
38 years and almost four months is over (maybe) my only love story, a good story, almost incredible guy who is now 21 years old and who was 19 when we met. Maybe I would have never entered into such a story if it were not for him, I ran away, but he was different, I loved him and I also to him. We were good, but sometimes, especially when we could not see us, had some days of deep melancholy. In those moments I thought that my presence at the bottom had not the strength to pull him out of his melancholy and it was a profound melancholy. The sex seemed above all a way to exorcise this melancholy but it inevitably returns. We all said, sometimes he got angry with me and told me that I did not understand, but despite everything we loved him deeply. Indeed from the beginning told me he loved me but that sex with me not really dragged. It did not surprise me because they are neither good nor too excited about certain things. He needed to fall in love even sexually, as had already happened before you know without being able to reach any conclusion because he was in love with a straight. I also said that he wanted to try with a girl and thought that it would be went well, but it really lacked a boy his age, or at least I thought it was so. Project, in 38 years I was beginning to think that being with him could be harm to him and who were living in another way his youth then I started to move away and leave the maximum space possible. When you do not chat with me, now he did not almost, chatted with a girl. I knew and he told me about it, then we felt less and less but we have never broken contacts, and we exchanged SMS messages on msn, very affectionate but I knew now that his path was different. In early October, I asked to see us and shows the girl, obviously a beautiful girl in love with him which is a nice guy. She knew nothing of not only us but even the fact that he was gay and that was me, this was obvious. I felt terribly uncomfortable. We went to get ice cream and then I went away with an excuse. He's been hurt in the evening and called me on msn. I asked him if he realized what he was doing with that girl and she told me that he loved and he was serious. I did not understand anything. He explained that they had made love and that he was fine. I did not know what to say, I tried to do everything not to disappoint him and encourage him to follow his own path or at least what he seemed on his way. Will not tell you how I was, mainly because I was told that the boy did not understand anything. I tried to keep him with a perfectly normal behavior, as before. After 15 days I called, came to my house, which was not a long time, and causes me just as it did before, but very sweet, as one who seeks a loving contact. I do not know what to do, I ask the girl and tells me that the girl is in love but not enough for him, he tried to do everything possible to forget about but did not succeed and that he needs me. At the moment it seems to me out of my head. He says he does not feel complete or to be alone with me or be alone with the girl. What puzzles me a bit ' first pulse and are tempted to dismiss it, but in practice it is impossible, I am a huge affection for me and you see that keeps us very much. When I hug him he's also a girl and I feel strange towards the girl. At the end, I know how things are and I accept it, and basically for me, I say honestly, it's not a shocking thing, but she knows nothing. We talk a lot right in this, I do not want to force any situation because I think that she would not accept it at all, would leave him and he would slip back into its bad and dark melancholy. I tell you honestly, Project, I love this guy, now I see him more relaxed than before, but I fear that his tentativo di conciliare cose difficilmente conciliabili lo porti a delusioni molto profonde. Lui della ragazza è innamorato veramente e si vede. Project, ho letto le cose che hai scritto sulla bisessualità e i conti tornano. Tu dici che per un gay mantenere un rapporto con un bisex è difficile ma io penso che ci riuscirei. Il problema adesso non sono io ma la possibile reazione della ragazza. Lui sa che con la ragazza deve parlarne ma non lo fa, prede tempo, e vive quel rapporto come se fosse un ragazzo etero. La ragazza non sa che ci vediamo e che lui dorme da me una sera a settimana e questo mi imbarazza terribilmente. Con lui sto bene, o meglio ci starei veramente bene solo se la ragazza accettasse veramente una cosa del genere, ma credo che non succederà ever. On the other hand to push him to talk to the girl I feel like pushing it to ruin. To him everything seems easy, probably just do not realize and it's about having a child with the girl, we really believe. Sometimes I feel so out of it but then when he comes to me, if I try to maintain a rigid position, there is bad and then hug him and I do not pretend to have all these thoughts in my head. When he sees me worried thinking about anything but the real reason for my concern. I thought I even talk to the girl, because she eventually I consider a despicable individual and would not have a point. What should I do Project? I'd like to talk a bit ' con te. Mi sa che quando parlavi di difficoltà di rapporto tra gay e bisex ti riferivi soprattutto a questo genere di problemi. Io non so nemmeno se sono innamorato di lui, so solo che gli voglio bene e che vorrei vederlo felice perché penso che abbia sofferto e che possa soffrire ancora molto più di me e non vorrei che accadesse per nessuna ragione.
Un abbraccio.
__________
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